recovery update: day 26

I am realizing, through the recovery from my injury, that I’m a bit of a busybody. And it’s never more apparent than during the weekend.

My mind wants to be outside, riding the bike, skiing, hiking or doing something very active. When the weather conspires to deliver unseasonably pleasant temperatures wit low humidity and plentiful sun, it simply rubs salt into the wound.

Don’t get me wrong: I’m enjoying spending my weekend time with sprite, going to the Dupont FreshFarm Market each weekend, and trying to make up for weekends that would normally have a lot of time committed to cycling. I’m becoming more involved with local politics, if only for an issue that has bothered me for some time. I’m going to homebrew some beer with a good friend. And I’m doing some much-needed inventory assessment of my media collections.

But this isn’t satisfying my busybody self, at least not enough to be a consistent substitute for my preferred weekend activity.

Recovery continues. I’ve gone a whole week without needing to use pain medication during my awake hours (I take ibuprofen before bed to allow for a more comfortable and restful sleep). I can walk more than 4 miles without difficulty or any lingering pain. And while there is general pain, it’s not as bad, nor is it as severe in the motions that are still guaranteed to make me wince a little. I’m going to add new exercises to my fitness regimen this week, too, which adds some much-needed variety.

I may even be able to ride my bike on a stationary trainer by the end of this week, so long as the pain continues to decrease.

And yes, anybody who knows me understands that I typically despise riding a stationary trainer. In many respects, I consider it somewhat fake cycling with minimal tangible benefit and a ton of boredom. I generally dislike working out indoors, even during the coldest of winter days, so I may get creative with this endeavor and set up a stationary trainer outside, on the sidewalk or at a local park, so long as it’s not raining. We’ll see….

But it still won’t be the full-on freedom package that I adore about cycling. It may be weeks before I’m commuting to work, and longer still before I’m going on club rides (a weekly ride I host starts up again in April, and I won’t be able to join the folks riding until sometime closer to May). And it will likely take most (if not all) of the summer for me to get back up to the speed and fitness of my usual riding buddies (I’m trying to steel my resolve about riding alone, which is the likely reality of a lot of my rides when I first start out again).

With my big summer goal ride now something for another year, I’m feeling the relief of removing the pressure that is involved with preparing for a big ride on a specific date, while feeling like I’m staring at a lot of unknown aspects of my summer. Will I get to do any big rides? If I can, will there be space available? Will my friends be able to ride with me, or will I have to go alone, knowing that I’m bound to meet lots of great people at the ride? It’s a lot of undefined time, which makes my mind race because it wants to fill up those days with activities on the bike – yet it can’t, at least not yet, and not with any certainty.

As you can likely suss out, I’m not all too happy about this. It makes me angry, sad, unhappy, you name it. As I tweeted last night, seeing folks riding their bikes makes me happy and sad: happy that they are out riding, sad that I can’t be among their ranks.

But I try to find the positive in all of this. I’m learning a lot more about the wonderful machine that is the human body. And I’m learning a lot about myself and certain aspects of my personality that I’ve not fully understood or appreciated until now. I will come back from this injury, stronger than before (if only because I’m a stubborn busybody), ready for any and all challenges. And before I know it, I’ll be back on the bike for the summer, and winter will return and I’ll ski once the snow flies again.

But right now, I’m impatient and frustrated. So if you encounter me and I’m a bit crabby, please realize that it’s very likely not your fault – it’s just an unfulfilled and fidgety busybody at an uneasy state of forced rest.